Stubbornness In The Face Of A Problem

Stubbornness In The Face Of A ProblemConfession: I can be very stubborn at times.  I come from a long line of stubborn individuals so it’s ingrained in my blood.  When I want to do something and I can’t, my stubbornness will often creep in and give me the perseverance to keep trying until I get it accomplished.

However, at times, this can be counter-productive.  Saturday night, I was working on a programming project that I’m pretty excited about.  Unfortunately, I hit a snag.  Something very simple wasn’t working and for the life of me I couldn’t figure out why.  I tried everything I could think of and it still wouldn’t work.  I even made two very simple pages to test the code and it still didn’t work.

This was elementary stuff.  There was no reason that I could think of why it wouldn’t work.  What’s more, the same code worked just find on another site of mine on the same server.   and yet a Google search revealed a lot of people having the same problem.  What it didn’t reveal right away was one easy method of solving the problem.  Instead, it seemed as though this problem could spring up from a dozen different issues, each harder than the last to test for.

I was determined to figure this out, however, so I kept trying possible solution after possible solution.  I made effort after effort, but they all failed.  Time and time again, that brick wall of a problem remained there without so much as a tiny crack for my efforts.

Any programmer will tell you that there comes a point in trying to solve a problem where you need to step away.  You should put the problem down, walk away, and do something completely different for awhile.  Continually trying to solve the problem will eventually just leave your brain in a rut, trying the same failed solutions over and over again.  Doing something else will let your brain wander and eventually your subconscious will spring up with an idea.

This is what I should have done.

Instead, I kept at it until 2am when I realized that I just couldn’t think anymore.  I went to sleep and tried to put the problem away, but I think I’ve been hammering away at it for too long.  Even as I wrote this, I kept switching windows back to my coding project, trying to find something that would make this wall of a problem come tumbling down.  Finally, I discovered my error and it was such a monumentally small error that it was something I kept overlooking all last night.

What do you do when you find a seemingly insurmountable problem?  Do you tend to keep stubbornly trying to solve it?  Or do you walk away and do something else?

Note: The "brick wall" image above is by krosseel and is available via morgueFile.

A Halloween Story Starring The Doctor, Harry Potter, Captain America

Once upon a time, the Doctor accompanied Harry Potter and Captain America.

costumes

(I wear a costume now.  Costumes are cool.)

They set off on a quest.  Now considering these three, you might think it was a quest to save the world, but actually they were just looking for some candy.

candy

(Peanut butter and chocolate.  Is there a better combination in this world?  I think not.)

It was a bit wet and cold, but they soldiered on and pretty soon they had quite a lot of candy.

lots-of-candy

(Sweet, sweet candy!)

Along the way, they braved some scary sights… such as Snoopy stuck into a pumpkin.

pumpkin-snoopy

(Don’t worry.  He sent Woodstock to get help.)

As they arrived home, they were greeted by a group of haunted pumpkins.

spooy-pumpkins

(Grim grinning pumpkins come out to socialize!)

Luckily, these were the ones they had carved earlier so everyone went in, warmed up, ate dinner, and then had a celebratory sugar cookie.

sugar-cookie

(The candy wasn’t eaten yet, but it would be.  It would be!)

Hope everyone had a happy and safe Halloween!

Doctor Who? Doctor TechyDad!

After spending time sewing my fez and bowtie and hunting down some suspenders, it’s time to reveal my Doctor outfit.

TheDoctorTechyDad Sonic-Fez-And-Bow-Tie

In fact, I think I’ve found my new Twitter Avatar:

DoctorAvatar

Want to know how much it all cost?  Well, here’s the breakdown:

The shirt, jacket, pants, and shoes (not pictured) were essentially free as I already owned these.  Same for the sonic screwdriver which was a birthday present.  The suspenders came from Hot Topic and cost about $9.20.  I made the bow tie myself out of materials that cost me about $1.30.  I also made the fez myself from materials that cost about $2.  This means that the Doctor outfit only cost me about $12.50.  Not bad.

There’s one more piece to my costume, though.

TARDIS-Key

Yes, that’s a TARDIS key.  This was a very easy project.  Do you ever get junk mailings from car dealerships with keys?  The intent is that you go to the dealership, try out the key, and you win a car if it fits in the car’s lock.  Of course, the entire setup is a ploy to get you into a dealership so they can sell you a car (when your key inevitably fails to fit in a car).

Instead of going to the dealership or tossing the key, I simply cleaned it off and used my label maker to make a "POLICE BOX" label for it.  (Yes, I know the TARDIS key on the show is all silver and doesn’t say "POLICE BOX."  Artistic license.)  It’s a small detail that I’m sure nobody will see, but I liked making it.  Now if only I can remember where I parked my TARDIS.

Now I just need to wait one more day until Halloween so I can wear this costume while the boys go trick or treating.  Is it Halloween yet?  What about now?  Man, time sure does go slowly when you don’t have a time machine!

Bubble, Bubble, Toil and Trouble

common-core-monsterFor quite some time now, our kids have been tormented by a shadowy being.  This creature has  haunted them at every turn.  It has scared them and hungers for their brains – among other things.  I wish I could say that this creature is some monster of legends, but unfortunately it is quite new.

This monster’s name is Common Core.

I’ve written about Common Core before, but unfortunately it is still haunting our kids.  Some monsters are created in a lab.  Common Core was created by bureaucrats and people who were looking to turn a profit off the educational system.  Some monsters break loose of their confines and wreck havoc while their creators stand helplessly by, lamenting their actions.  Common Core’s rampage is being watched by its creators, but they are cheering it on.

Recently, New York State Education Commissioner John King held what was to be one of many forums to show how Common Core really isn’t a monster.  Instead, he was greeted by parents understandably angry about how their kids’ education was being ruined and how their kids are hating and not loving school.  (Common Core ostensibly is designed to get kids ready for college, but a child who learns to hate school won’t choose to attend college.)

King’s reaction to seeing angry parents?  Shut down all forums and blame it on "special interests."  (Translation: Parents weren’t just taking my message and shutting up about their complaints.  How dare they continue to complain!)

After much more complaining, John King and New York State Education Department (NYSED) decided to host some more forums, though with radically changed formats.  The first of these new forums started last week.

Unfortunately, from the get-go, King and NYSED didn’t make the right moves.  The first problem was the time.  They set it to take place from 4pm – 6pm.  If you are a parent of a school age child, you might know 4pm as "that time around which I am picking up my child from school."  If you are a working parent, you might know 4pm as "that time that I’m still at work."  If you are a teacher, you know 4pm as "that time that the kids are heading home but that I’m not off work yet."

In other words, the 4pm start time excluded parents (especially working parents) and teachers.  These are two of the biggest groups of people who might have complaints about Common Core and New York State’s implementation of it.  These are also precisely the "special interests" that King wanted to avoid.  (B was able to make it but only because her father was able to pick up the boys from school.  I was unable to attend as I couldn’t leave the office so soon.)

Eventually, the time was extended to 7pm to give people more time, but the start time was still an issue.

The parking situation was another issue.  The school building that was chosen could not handle the influx of people trying to park.  For one thing, it was a SCHOOL and thus had kids trying to leave at the end of the day.  You know, right when the forum was due to start.  There were also after school activities planned that would have complicated issues.  The principal wound up cancelling all after school activities, but parking remained and issue.  People had to park a half mile or more away and walk to the school.

To make matters worse, the governor (himself a huge Common Core supporter and the person who said that public schools might be shut down if they don’t raise their test scores) made sure there was a big police presence.  Again, the stated goal of this was to keep the peace, but exactly what were they envisioning happening?  Hordes of parents, teachers, and students rushing the stage screaming for King’s head on a platter?

At every turn, the victims of the Common Core monster were themselves being treated like monsters.

The forum wound up going off smoothly and a lot of people voiced their opinions of the Common Core beast.  Interestingly, King refused to look up at the speakers.  For someone who apparently wanted to put on a show about caring what parents, teachers, and students were experiencing, he certainly didn’t put any effort into it.  The only time he looked at a parent was when the parent called him on his lack of eye contact and TOLD him to look at her.

(For more on the forum, read B’s post today: Advocacy on the Go.)

After the forum, King declared that he had heard all of the concerns and would examine the test schedule.  A couple of days later, NYSED announced that a test would not be given and the media hyped this as a victory for those against Common Core and high stakes testing.

But it wasn’t.

The test in question is only being canceled for honors students who are taking a different test on that day.  This isn’t a great victory or even a small step in the right direction.  This is a token offering that is being made in the hopes that this one tiny test cancellation will make the parents, teachers, and students of New York State forget the devastation that the Common Core monster has wrought.  This is righting one garbage can when a whole city lies in ruins and saying "All fixed!"

John King and NYSED might still listen to parents, teachers, and students and fix this mess, but you’ll forgive me if I don’t hold my breath.  I want to be optimistic.  I really do.  The realist in me, though, thinks that more money will go to charter schools run by businesses looking for a profit, more money will go to big businesses like Pearson and InBloom looking to turn a profit off of students’ education and/or information, and students will remain last people actually considered when those in charge think about the education system.  Sadly, this monster movie is far from over.  The monster is still on the loose and very few people in charge seem to even care about the devastation it is causing.

NOTE: The monster image above is "godzilla danger" by morlok and is available from OpenClipArt.org.  (I modified it to add the "Common Core" text to it.)

Self-Doubt and Self-Achievement

After publishing my Voice of Self Doubt post, I began to think about it a bit more.  I went over it in my mind over and over.  Something about it was bothering me.  Suddenly, I realized a big gaping hole in my post.

Let’s see if you can spot it:

The truth is that blog postings often leave out the whole picture. Beyond that photo of the a perfectly clean dining room is a living room overrun with toys.  Beyond the recipe of the perfect dinner that was posted is the not discussed empty McDonald’s containers in the trash.  Beyond the blog post about a husband and wife having a perfect time out is the non-blogged-about argument the previous night.  Those details tend to get whitewashed out of a social media presence.  The result is that your average family, warts and all, looks perfect online.  Then, when you compare your situation (with the warts not glossed over) with the seemingly perfect online lives of others, I know this is true, but The Voice of Self Doubt twists it to play to my insecurities.

Did you see it yet?

The gaping hole is that I’m trying to prove to The Voice Of Self Doubt that it is wrong by discrediting its "evidence" of seemingly perfect people online by assuming their lives are airbrushed.  This has the weakness of needing their lives to actually BE airbrushed.  If one person is actually as good in real life as they appear online,  then The Voice of Self Doubt would hold that up as "iron clad proof" of my inadequacy.

I often say that a bully’s most insidious tactic is making the bullied play by the bully’s rules.  Someone who is bullied can often get the bully in trouble and stop the torment if they report it to someone.  Unfortunately, all too often, the bully has convinced his victim that getting any help at all is WRONG and NOT to be done.  So the victim continues to suffer while trying fruitlessly trying to find an escape from the situation that keeps within the bully’s rules.  Spoiler: There isn’t one.

When you get right down to it, The Voice of Self Doubt is an internal bully.  It belittles you and your accomplishments.  It tears down your confidence.  It tries to make you feel worthless.  Worst of all, it tries to set the "rules" for feeling good about yourself and it tricks you into playing by those rules.  This means it is easy to be trapped by The Voice of Self Doubt, struggling to find a nonexistent exit that The Voice made.

So how do you really escape from The Voice of Self Doubt?

Rule one is to ditch any comparisons with other people.  It doesn’t matter that she has a better body than you, that he is smarter than you, or that they can afford to take better vacations that you can.  Similarly, don’t try to tie your happiness to the fact that someone else is uglier, dumber, less wealthy, or somehow "worse" than you are.  Instead, look to yourself.

Yesterday, I finished up my "sew my own bow tie" project for my Doctor Who costume.  Now, if I were comparing myself to others, I’d notice every single flaw in my project.  Every single stitch that didn’t go quite right.  Everything I could have done – had I been more talented – to have made my project more elaborate.

I didn’t do this, though.  I didn’t waste time feeling sorry for myself because other people are able to do more in depth and more amazing projects than I can.  Instead, I just revealed in the pride of having just made my own bow tie.  I quickly put on a dress shirt, took out the fez that I made a few weeks ago, grabbed my sonic screwdriver, and took a few photos.

TechyDad_The_Doctor bow-tie-fez-sonic-screwdriver

Do you see The Voice of Self Doubt in that picture?  No?  That’s because he’s not there.  He’s tied up in the corner with quite a lot of duct tape over his mouth.  He’ll be back, I’m sure.  He’s pesky that way.  But I’ve realized that the key to beating The Voice of Self Doubt is to focus your attention on yourself and not others.  In other words, to beat The Voice of Self Doubt, listen to The Voice of Self Achievement.

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