Altered Plans Equals Turbulence

This weekend, we were supposed to go to my parents’ house.  Living over 3 hours away from them means that I don’t get to see them often and I’ve been looking forward to it.  As the trip approached, various circumstances kept threatening to cancel our trip.  Finally, on the day before we were supposed to leave, B wasn’t feeling good.  She definitely wasn’t up to making the trip.  To make matters worse, another storm was bearing down on my parents’ house.  It looked like, even if I went with the boys, we would be just sitting around my parents’ house for a couple of days.  Reluctantly, I called my parents and they agreed we should reschedule.

Luckily, I took this change of plans completely in stride.  If you define "completely in stride", as "acted as a ‘just me’ and moped about the altered plans."

Those who have dealt with people with Asperger’s know that we can get attached to our plans.  Change them and you risk a melt down.  I didn’t exactly "melt down" on the outside, but I was going nuclear on the inside.  I’ll admit that I was silently blaming B, the Universe, everyone and everything for not caring about me and keeping the plans that I wanted to do.

In my more calm state, I can appreciate that this is *exactly* the sort of thing that NHL screams when plans he holds dear are changed.  This is the sort of thing that we are always working with NHL to help him handle better.  Mind you, I didn’t vocalize any of this.  I’ve long since learned to internalize these thoughts so I don’t hurt anyone when my mind lashes out.  I even snuck upstairs for a bit to have some moping time to myself so any mutterings weren’t overheard and so I could calm myself down.  Still, it’s clear that I need some work on taking my own advice.

In the end, the storm my parents were supposed to have came to our house instead.  (An additional 4 inches at least – probably more.)  It took a day or so, but I calmed down and gained perspective.  I even had a bunch of fun moments with the boys while B recuperated.  (More on that in later posts.)

All in all, it was a fun way to end 2012.  Here’s hoping that 2013 is just as fun (though a bit less turbulence would be appreciated).